Is love more intense than lust?

When it comes to how we feel, there is a popular belief that love conquers all, and that no feeling ever comes close to it. But as we know, sometimes people confuse being in love with other feelings, and the one which often gets throw into the mix is the sensation of lust. If you think about it, your desire for a person can indeed be so strong that it might overcome your love for them, and you might in fact be confused about which of those two things you are actually feeling. So let’s take a look at the two concepts of love and lust, and let’s see how different from each other they really are.


What is love?

This is a great question indeed, and many artists and poets have given their lives and souls in the pursuit of figuring this out. If we watch movies and read books, we can see that love means different things to different people and if we ask others what they think love is, they will often give us different responses. To keep it simple, the most basic love feelings can be found within a family. So if your parents have looked after you well and have always been there for you, you will feel love towards them. Likewise with your close friends who have stuck with you through thick and thin; you know them inside out and you know you can count on them; and that is love too. So placing this in the context of a relationship, love comes as you know you can trust your partner with your life. So basically, love is something which comes over time with knowledge and trust of a person.

Lust and desire?

So you’re probably thinking: what about love at first sight then? Well the truth is that this kind of feeling is more of a disproportionate infatuation and a reflection of our own desires. When we see someone and we immediately ‘fall in love’ with them, we are merely desiring them; even if the feeling feels very intense. After all, how could you feel the same way about someone you’ve just met as you feel towards people who have been there for you all your life? Think about it, instant love isn’t real love, it is desire, and possibly lust. Those feelings are very intense indeed, and going online talking to people using naughty dating websites (click here for a good example) will make you feel just as intensely; if not stronger than the love you have for the people you know. But of course, lust is very much a spur of the moment thing, driven by our body rather than our minds.

How to make the difference?

The two feelings are truly different in nature, yet they rival each other in terms of intensity, so people often confuse what they feel. It doesn’t help us that the media is constantly misrepresenting love; with movies and TV shows giving us the wrong idea of which one is what. The best way to figure it all out is to understand that love is a long term feeling that comes over time with knowledge and trust of a person; whilst lust is something we can feel instantly over anybody. Love is the long game, lust is short term, and often short lived too. So try to make the difference in your head and you will feel more at peace with yourself; and you will know when you are in love and when you are just feeling infatuated.